The other night I wrote a blog post about how I’m
changing as a person; about how my pursuit of creative fulfilment is changing
my attitude to life. It was also about how my changing attitude to life is
improving my pursuit of creative fulfilment, for you can’t have one without the
other. Over the course of 2012, I became tired of feeling ‘busy’ without ever
striking the right balance. I accepted that to aim for success, I had to start ‘doing’
rather than ‘talking about doing’.
Do the important things, cut out the extraneous things.
It’s a long process, and one I’ve only just started. It’s
a process that may never end, and will almost certainly see my thoughts and
feelings change again over the coming weeks and months.
The pursuit of a ‘simpler’ life coincided with Christmas,
and I felt the need to reflect on what that means. How do I communicate my changing
attitude to the people around me? Society is so entrenched, particularly in the
consumer ideals of Christmas, that it was a shock to suddenly find myself
standing on the margins gazing in. I felt a crushing weight of guilt that
suddenly my family might not know who I am. How can they, if I don’t really
know who I am?
With fevered creative energy, I wrote for two hours.
Smashed out 1300 words, trying to illustrate the journey I find myself on. I
worried the tone was wrong or could be misinterpreted, but I read and re-read
it and felt confident I’d captured that feeling of change. I’d never felt such
dynamism in my writing and I hoped that would come across to the readers; I
rushed it onto the blog, thinking I had achieved some sort of breakthrough.
In hindsight, it probably contained enough material for
two or three separate posts. Two or three considered
posts. There is a time for dynamism, but maybe not when trying to reflect. I’ve
read enough good writing by other creative folk to understand that these things
are better approached in a sustainable fashion, rather than going all out to
achieve some instant epiphany.
So I’ve deleted what I wrote. I’m going to channel that
dynamism in a different direction, and build on the sense that I want to
communicate my evolving philosophy. I still think I’ve got a viewpoint and story
to offer to other creatives, I just need to establish the right way of telling
it. And accept that sometimes I won’t always get it right.
Hi Paul, that's a shame, but I agree that sometimes if a post is very long and labyrinthian people are a lot less likely to read it or take away a lesson from it. This one however, is the perfect length and makes a very clear point!
ReplyDeleteI look forward to hearing the ideas you were exploring in their more considered form :)
Thanks for taking the time to comment, Milo, appreciate it.
ReplyDeleteIt was a hard lesson to learn, and learnt in a hard way, but one from which I hope I have at least learnt well.